The ego- a challenge that is constantly revisited.


“Great dancers are not great because of their technique,
they are great because of their passion.”
– Martha Graham

Friday evening BJJ in Bellevue.

I need to quit being so lazy about blogging my classes the same day- if I wait, I really have problems transcribing the techniques, and I can only assume that’s going to translate to further problems retaining them.

I remember that I warmed up rolling with Peter. He is getting quite technical, but still using a lot of muscle. I guess I have not worked with anyone in a good while who muscles that much. I had thought I had grown out of the whole dick-waving thing where I try (vainly, of course) to muscularly match muscley men who are much more massive than me. Found out that I am not. I kind of hurt myself straining against him, and I also hurt myself by being too stubborn to tap. I certainly EXHAUSTED myself. Time to revisit that important lesson.

We did some guard pulling from standing, and a sweep, and some triangle stuff, and Carlos pointed out that we do not need to have our bodies torqued way over to the side to do the triangle. We can just alter the angle of the leg. And of course, it is critical to remember that pushing your leg down/forward is a lot more effective than trying to basically squeeze your thighs together in a nutcracker motion.

Teepee. Chrisanne was delighted with this, as it seemed to solve some of her short-leg issues in finishing the triangle. While I was happy for her, three reps of this gave me an immediate splitting headache.

I was taking my headache toward the locker room when Cindy walked in. For once in my life, my reaction to seeing Cindy walk in was “shit!”…… because I knew that she was competing the next day, and I had also mentioned the Friday evening Bellevue classes to her the day before- so I couldn’t just flee without letting her beat on me some. She wanted to drill a horrible takedown- a twisty arm drag that wrenches the elbow, shoulder, *and* back; and while you are writhing in pain, you get your foot hooked and hoisted above your head to get dumped hard. The first eight or ten weren’t too bad, but after that, I wanted to cry. It would have hurt any time, but after my lengthy muscle-roll with Peter and my pounding headache, it was agony. Had to really grit my teeth to stop myself from saying, “I’m sorry, I just can’t do any more of this tonight” (probably with a sob on the final syllable). After drilling, I was able to roll a bit with her, then begged off and gave her Ron instead. I always feel bad/ashamed that I just don’t have what it takes to be a good uke for Cindy, especially when she is in comp mode….. I always try, but end up feeling really inadequate.

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